Sam Wants to Talk About Our Relationship

In the summer of 2020, during the Covid pandemic, Sam wanted to discuss our relationship. I objected, stating that our interactions were strictly professional. Despite this, she continued to insist on the existence of a relationship, referencing psychoanalytic concepts like transference and countertransference. One of the cruxes of this story is Sam's ability (or inability) to manage her own countertransference.

The Beginning

Everyone wonders what their therapist thinks of them. Mostly, we want to know if they think we're normal. Sometimes we want to know if we're their favorite patient. I now had some idea: she wanted me to like her.

Who I Am, Why I’m Writing This

Patients aren’t usually the authors of case studies, but I thought it was important to document how this happened, the impact these boundary violations had on me, and some of the flags I missed along the way.

What Makes This More Than A Story

You're going to read about my breakdown. I'll introduce myself and a pseudonym for my former therapist in another post. What makes this more than just me telling my story is that I will post recordings, images of texts and emails, and some of her notes.

Boundary Violations – A Simple Intro

It is fundamental that anyone who goes to a therapist is there to get help with their own problems, not to be a solution to the therapist’s. That's not how it turned out in this case. Here's a little explainer on boundaries and why they're important in therapy.